6 Life Skills to Teach Your Kid Before They Head Off to College

I was picking up my son from school when my daughter FaceTimes me. “Is everything OK?” I asked. “Yeah, but can you show me how to turn on the stove?” That’s when it hit me—I needed to teach her a few essential skills before she headed off to college.

Today, as more and more high schools eliminate good old “Home Economics” (no matter your age or gender there is something to be said for those skills taught in that now-forgotten class) there’s a lot Gen Z doesn’t know. While there is a range of emotions going on as your child prepares for college (some would call it a roller coaster) it’s important to carve out some time to teach incoming freshmen a few things before they head off. Here are important skills they need before they ditch ‘ya.

1. How to Fry an Egg

Eggs are a great protein source—they can be breakfast, lunch, dinner, or even a hangover staple anytime. Most dorms will have a communal kitchen of some sort, and all you need is a frying pan, some butter and an egg to make this an everyday meal. You’d be surprised at how many kids don’t know much about cooking, and while they’ve probably eaten their fair share of eggs, they most likely don’t know how to make them “crispy on the edges with a soft center.”

2. How to Treat a Stain

The more independent my child becomes, the more plans she makes, the more outfits she needs—and yes—the more food stains that come home on them. Sure, you can throw a Tide stick in their bag, but these kids really need to know how to use it for the stain to disappear. I know from experience, they need to see you use some elbow grease and hot water, often a few times over, in order to get out the stubborn ones.

3. How to Make Hospital Corners

While there are many ways to make a bed, if you went to camp you probably learned about hospital corners. This method (tucking sheets at a 45 degree angle) creates a crisp, neat appearance. It might have started in hospitals but it’s easy, efficient and instantly makes the bed look tidy. And since dorm rooms aren’t so big, the more neat-looking the bed, the more put-together the whole dorm room will seem to be. Adjusting to a small (often shared) space is yet another step of growth for your child, and teaching them about hospital corners is a round- about way of helping them get there.

4. How to Sign Their Name

You’d be surprised how many Gen Z’ers don’t know how to write their names in script. Or maybe you wouldn’t be. But learning how to write their own version of a John Hancock? It’s part of what makes you unique. You might not need to sign a check someday but there’s nothing like a handwritten, signed note, and writing your name is a mandatory part of that. Which leads me to number 5….

5. How to Write a Thank You Note

Yes, a real note. Pen or pencil to paper. Sure, ChatGPT might help you form the words, but if you’re my kid, you know how I feel: nothing shows appreciation like a hand-written note with a three sentence minimum. Beyond the greeting, you can’t go wrong with including how you’ll use the gift, and adding something personal. It just makes the note more thoughtful, less blah.

6. And Finally, Share Your Own Stories—the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

I recently went on a few celebratory trips with a lot of college friends. One group was 16 people, 8 couples who paired off at school, or shortly thereafter. In my post-trip contemplations, I haven’t just been thinking about how much these people mean to me. I’ve also been thinking about what my “group” must look like to my soon-to-be college freshman, who’s known them her whole life.

And I realized this: one of the reasons heading off to college might be particularly daunting, is the pressure to think that’s what college is supposed to look like—everyone paired off, everyone close from the start. In reality, it took years for some of these relationships to happen (we didn’t all start the same year) but to my daughter, it’s hard for her to picture anything other than what she sees today.

So here’s my most important piece of advice to parents about to launch their kids off: share with them more than you were ever comfortable sharing in the past. Show them you’re human. Show them you made mistakes. While we are way past our college years and therefore (mostly) less awkward, careless and carefree, there was a time when many of us, were all of those things. To our kids, we might look like we have it all together, and it’s important to share that relationships don’t come in a pretty perfect box wrapped up in a bow.

Tell them some college stories where you struggled a little bit. Maybe you have a freshman year story where you were ditched at a party, or an initial friend group fell through, or a love interest disappointed you in some way. Maybe you registered for a class that was way out of your league and wound up having to drop it to prevent a total downslide in your GPA. It won't be perfect for them, but it wasn't for you either and they don’t know what they don’t know. So tell them about that time you totally failed in finding a date for the date party (you survived and they will too).